patience has a partner in love

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all of creation responds to kindness in a similar way. kindness disarms defences and brings hearts to a common level.

i’m not all surprised that the the first description of what real love looks like is that love is patient followed by love is kind. have you ever attempted to show kindness in a state of impatience? can you say difficult? however, have you shown kindness and seen impatience melt like snow?

one of my pet peeves is rudeness. funny thing is that my distaste for rudeness can make me impatient and rude…dah, dee…how does that work? you dislike rude people so you’ll be rude. that is not a congruent philosophy, is it?

a key to converting impatience to patience is the space between our impulses and our actions. it’s all about the timing.

customer service people often face hour by hour rude customer’s which can wear them down and bring out the rudeness in their personalities. dealing with a rude store clerk provokes a reaction inside me. there was a time that it provoked anger, frustration and corresponding responses…but over time i’ve learned that if i allow a kind response to provoke my actions, the result is more beneficial.

i was standing in line the other day at a shop and the clerk was not very nice. i stood and listened as she snapped at customer after customer. some customers snapped back and others exhibited the sting on their stunned faces. when it was my turn to be served, i began with, ” bless your heart, it looks like you are rushed off your feet. does that make for a rough day?” her whole demeanor changed. “i’m having such a difficult day.” then she began to share her heart concerning many other difficulties she was facing in her life. i was presented with a wounded heart. opportunities like that are jewels to me and had i impulsively responded to her rudely…i would have denied myself that opportunity. by the time i stepped away from the counter, she and i were giggling, she gave me a special manager’s discount and she thanked me for putting her day back into a positive perspective. as i approached the exit i heard her say, ” hello, how is your day going? at least the sun is shining, that makes the day more fun when you are shopping.” the customer behind me was being greeted kindly and cheerfully.

patience and kindness are partners when it comes to love. they are a great team!

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on this subject, i think Paul had some great advice (message version):
if you help, just help, don’t take over;
if you teach, stick to your teaching;
if you give encouraging guidance, be careful that you don’t get bossy;
if you’re put in charge, don’t manipulate;
if you’re called to give aid to people in distress, keep your eyes open and be quick to respond;
if you work with the disadvantaged, don’t let yourself get irritated with them or depressed by them.

Keep a smile on your face.

Love from the center of who you are; don’t fake it.
Run for dear life from evil; hold on for dear life to good.
Be good friends who love deeply; practice playing second fiddle.

Don’t burn out; keep yourselves fueled and aflame.
Be alert servants of the Master, cheerfully expectant.
Don’t quit in hard times; pray all the harder.

Help the needy; be inventive in hospitality.
Bless your enemies; no cursing under your breath.
Laugh with your happy friends when they’re happy; share tears when they’re down.

Get along with each other; don’t be stuck-up.
Make friends with nobodies; don’t be the great somebody.

Don’t hit back;
discover beauty in everyone.

If you’ve got it in you, get along with everybody.

Don’t insist on getting even; that’s not for you to do. “I’ll do the judging,” says God. “I’ll take care of it.”

Our Scriptures tell us that if you see your enemy hungry, go buy that person lunch, or if he’s thirsty, get him a drink. Your generosity will surprise him with goodness.

Don’t let evil get the best of you; get the best of evil by doing good.

a kind heart is not for the wimpy…it shows strength of character and maturity.

Paul also advised, “Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking…always dragging you down to its level of immaturity.” it is much easier to fit into a grumpy culture; however, it’s not nearly as rewarding. being grumpy doesn’t get you closer to your goals and dreams of being loved…but kindness will.

even the most difficult person to deal with is on a search for acceptance and love. the love we long for is true and genuine…and it is patient and kind.

my advice for practicing kindness: the most fun you’ll have is to get out there and share a few random acts of kindness…it will melt your heart and the hearts of those you show kindness to…have fun with it!

remember practice makes perfect, this one should be easy!

if you accept the challenge, let me know how it goes in the comments section…or share how you have turned potentially volatile situations around by showing love in the form of kindness.

thanks for reading,
D

Obstacles Bring Growth

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“The lotus is the most beautiful flower, whose petals open one by one. But it will only grow in the mud. In order to grow and gain wisdom, first you must have the obstacles of life and its suffering. … The mud speaks of the common ground that humans share, no matter what our stations in life. … Whether we have it all or we have nothing, we are all faced with the same obstacles: sadness, loss, illness, dying and death. If we are to strive as human beings to gain more wisdom, more kindness and more compassion, we must have the intention to grow as a lotus and open each petal one by one.”― Goldie Hawn

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how to prevent rejection

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encourage the timid and faint hearted, help and give your support to the weak souls, and be very patient with everybody (always keeping your temper).

see that none of you repays another with evil for evil, but always aim to show kindness and seek to do good to one another and everybody. -Paul

a peaceful solution to a que jumper (someone cutting line)

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I enjoyed this story. To me, it shows that there are witty, peaceful and kind ways to deal with people who do not show regard for politeness.

I hope you enjoy:

Today, a true tale of heroism that takes place not in a war zone, nor a hospital, but in Victoria station in London in 2007, during a tube strike. Our hero – a transport journalist and self-described “big, stocky bloke with a shaven head” named Gareth Edwards, who first wrote about this experience on the community blog metafilter.com – is standing with other commuters in a long, snaking line for a bus, when a smartly dressed businessman blatantly cuts in line behind him. (Behind him: this detail matters.)

The interloper proves immune to polite remonstration, whereupon Edwards is seized by a magnificent idea. He turns to the elderly woman standing behind the queue-jumper, and asks her if she’d like to go ahead of him. She accepts, so he asks the person behind her, and the next person, and the next – until 60 or 70 people have moved ahead, Edwards and the seething queue-jumper shuffling further backwards all the time. The bus finally pulls up, and Edwards hears a shout from the front of the line. It’s the elderly woman, addressing him: “Young man! Do you want to go in front of me?”

Author: Oliver Burkeman in “The Guardian Weekend”, 28 August 2010

precious heart gifts

20130815-210803.jpgdon’t allow a familiar attitude to rob you of the exquisite miracle of love…cherish the ones who trust you with their heart.
it’s not a right…it’s an amazing gift.

tried and purified words could save you some grief

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1. Words are important.
2. Just because you think it…you don’t have to say it.
3. Test your words.
4. Purify your words.
5. If your words don’t pass the test…maybe you should swallow them instead of spilling them.
6. If your words are not pure in intent, motive and loving…STOP…re-THINK what you’re about to say.

foolish lips bring strife and a foolish mouth invites a beating.

every word of God is tried and purified…maybe we should follow His example.

we could save ourselves some grief.

A little food for thought.
D 🌺

the miraculous offering of acceptance

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since we know the pain that rejection can cause, shouldn’t we offer others a miracle…acceptance for the unique gift they can be to us?

Acceptance is seeing with your heart not your eyes

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An elderly woman and her little grandson, whose face was sprinkled with bright freckles, spent the day at the zoo.

Lots of children were waiting in line to get their cheeks painted by a local artist who was decorating them with tiger paws. “You’ve got so many freckles, there’s no place to paint!” a girl in the line said to the little fella.

Embarrassed, the little boy dropped his head. His grandmother knelt down next to him. “I love your freckles. When I was a little girl I always wanted freckles,” she said, while tracing her finger across the child’s cheek. “Freckles are beautiful.”

The boy looked up, “Really?”

“Of course,” said the grandmother. “Why just name me one thing that’s prettier than freckles.”

The little boy thought for a moment, peered intensely into his grandma’s face and softly whispered, “Wrinkles.”

-writer unknown

acceptance is one of three core motivations for many of our behaviours. join me this week as we look at accepting ourselves, dealing with rejection and understanding how acceptance/rejection issues motivate our behaviours.

see you soon,
D

be the inspiration for someone’s smile today

be the inspiration for someone’s smile today