proof that King Solomon was not a morning person

Posted on February 27, 2014 by Dee Clark

is your “happy” too loud?

in the heart warming movie, We Bought A Zoo, Rosie can’t sleep because of the night owls’ party next door. she tells her daddy that she can’t sleep because, “their happy is too loud”.

i love that.

by the way, they don’t try to turn the happy down either.

i’m a night owl. always have been.

so, when i read proverbs 27 tonight, i had to giggle as i thought,

“King Solomon might not have been a morning person”!

i could relate to his wisdom on this one…

early birds and morning people are so chirpy and cheerful. their “happy” is loud!

but actually…although frustrating (sometimes)…it’s pretty cool!

so, no grumpy night owl here…go ahead…

Be happy!

2 keys to dealing with confronting communications

Posted on January 19, 2014 by Dee Clark

a gentle response defuses anger, but a sharp tongue kindles tempers. -Proverbs

good communication is an important foundation for strong relationships.

communication breakdowns occur when strong, negative emotions overshadow the message. as women, we can be very passionate when we feel strongly about an issue.

there is a temptation to release the tension caused by angry emotions by yelling, slamming doors or other outbursts. however, an angry approach adds fuel to the fire. the emotion then becomes the focus. the message you are trying to communicate can become diminished or misunderstood. as a result nothing positive is achieved.

expressing emotion is an important part of communication as well. the key is to communicate them so that you can move past them, not fuel them.

when we find ourselves in a confrontation, it’s important to remember these 2 things:

an answer should be given – the injured person should not wrap himself in sullen silence
and that answer should be gentle

gentleness can be firm without being harsh.

i was visiting my daughter the other day and my grandchildren wanted to tell me about a conflict they had with each other.

each was passionate about their position. the end result of the conflict was not very good, even from their young perspectives.

it caused me to realise how important it is to teach children to communicate what they are feeling, communicate their feelings, value each person’s feelings, respect another person’s boundaries, forgive and move on.

so, we practiced.

at first, neither wanted to participate. i had to respect that.

within a few minutes, my granddaughter agreed and decided she did want to practice what she should do.

as she and i began to practice how to communicate, my grandson decided that he would practice as well…because it meant that he would be heard.

by the end of the exercise, they had practiced communicating to the their sibling what they wanted to say, asking for forgiveness, and giving forgiveness.

life skills are not caught…they are taught.

when we are given the appropriate tools, we have a better chance at being successful.

and we all want to be successful at whatever we attempt to do.

conflicts are difficult. they can be painful but they are not impossible to resolve.

good communication skills can help us to focus on the issue and not become side tracked.

you don’t have to remain silent if the issue is important to your heart.

your response can either help or prevent a successful outcome.

the choice is fully yours to make.

anger will ignite an unsuccessful outcome and gentleness will defuse the situation.

i suffer with you

Posted on November 17, 2013 by Dee Clark

empathy is the ability to step into the shoes of another person, aiming to understand their feelings and perspectives, and to use that understanding to guide our actions.

expand empathy by gaining direct experience of other people’s lives, putting into practice the Native American proverb, “Walk a mile in another man’s moccasins before you criticize him.”

5 reasons silence is effective

Posted on October 24, 2013 by Dee Clark

sometimes, there is just no better solution than silence.

i have found silence to be a very effective tool in my little life toolbox. life skills are valuable and i would categorize this under healthy boundaries.

this one was hard for me to learn since early on in my life i determined in my heart that i would have my say. i thought it was a safety net. instead, often, it was a hole in my bucket. it often caused things to get worse.

of all the subjects to be discussed, proverbs gives many keys of wisdom on the mouth, the words we speak, and how we speak them. it is strange to my mind that not saying anything all can be more effective than saying everything i think at the time.

i have learned that it truly is an effective boundary and more times than not…it works.

reasons why silence is so effective:
1. i am not always right. shock horror! yet true. what works for me will not always work for someone else’s life. each person has their own journey. allowing them to make that journey the best way they can is important.

2. sometimes, people just need someone to listen. i’m a fixer. not everything has to be fixed. there are times when only a listening ear is necessary.

3. the timing is all wrong for what someone needs to hear. maybe someone who trusts me needs
accountability. however, a heart must feel safe, be open and ready to hear. if the timing is wrong i could make matters worse.

4. the person already knows. they may be looking for agreement for a wrong position. i don’t have to give my agreement but i don’t have to spell it out for them either. they already know what to do. giving them time to work it out can be more effective than pushing them.

5. the situation may be too volatile or ridiculous. i used to wonder why grandmothers would shake their head and walk away…there is a good reason. you just can’t put a workable solution into words. my husband is the king of off the wall comments…silliness. i have found myself shaking my head and walking away! he then comes out with, “that’s a pretty silly thing to say, eh?” then I can give it a, “um, yeah!” done. it works for anger as well. although listening to a rant is not easy, my boundary is “if you communicate in a responsible way, i will participate in the conversation. if not, i will be silent until you can.” conflicts are many times fewer than ever. it works with children, too. i tell my grandchildren that when they are ready to calm down we can talk…until then I won’t be talking to them.

there is something about our human nature that does not like to feel like we are being ignored.

i have a sister who is 13 years younger than i am. when she was a toddler and annoying (at least to a teenager), i would tell my other teenage sister to “i-g-n-o-r-e her” and my baby sister would yell, “don’t ik-nore me!”

although, what i am talking about is different than ignoring someone, silence is more effective and gets someone’s attention much better than lectures, nagging, or being pushy. i am talking about using wisdom verses manipulation. you will know the difference! it is often very clear where silence is best served and effective.

there are times when i do not stand in silence: bullying, abuse, and matters of safety. still, wisdom can be applied…maybe fewer words or the proper authority can do the speaking. at any rate, the key is to use wisdom and not go to extremes at one end or the other…you don’t want to say too much but you don’t want to be totally silent either.

have you ever asked yourself, “why did i say?” Or have you said, ” i’m always putting my foot in my mouth”?

if so, you might want to develop a healthy boundary that allows you the ability to sometimes, say nothing at all.

give it a try. practice. see if it works for you like it has for me.

for help, check out the wisdom found in proverbs.

when learning this life skill, i would do word fasts. i would fast (or cut out) all unnecessary words as a way to develop the discipline.

there are many effective ways to practice.

silence truly is powerful!

take a responsible step

Posted on October 1, 2013 by Dee Clark

the practical language of love

Posted on September 28, 2013 by Dee Clark

a couple of cancerous emotions

Posted on September 14, 2013 by Dee Clark

hello, again

i am in the middle of a two part move. moving once is a huge job but moving twice in one month is unbelievable. i am not complaining though. i am actually right in my element doing the nesting thing. my biggest challenge is not to go over board in the temporary dwelling. i could have a great time updating and decorating this old 1920 style home but i will do my best to refrain.

instead, i have been concentrating my time on deep cleaning my belongings that have been in storage for 3 years. it’s a little like Christmas…opening the boxes and realizing that i have several items that i have lived without for so long. it is also a great time for de-cluttering. many of the articles i have read about things that you hold onto and box away state that if you have lived without it for say 6 months…it probably can go without you ever missing it. i quite enjoy the de-cluttering process. there is nothing like a good purge, so to speak. it refreshes me to come to terms with the items i have accumulated that were totally unnecessary and focus on the worthwhile items that will actually make life better and easier.

this brings me back to my topic. this may require a little de-cluttering of the heart.

i was writing about love before my big move became a part of my busy schedule. i shared that love never gives up (is patient) and is more concerned with others than it is for self (is kind).

today, lets look at the fact that love is never envious or jealous. no one will go through their life having never felt envious or jealous. these are common feelings that we all experience from time to time. however, if these feelings are not handled correctly and in a positive way, they can cause us to loose our peaceful state of mind or, in exaggerated cases, incapacitate our pursuit of happiness.

i learned as a young woman that i did not like the “green-eyed monster” that i could become if i allowed jealousy to take hold of my heart. envy and jealousy are not very pretty attributes.

jealousy has a competitive edge to it. this is where those ever-so-famous “Joneses” got themselves into trouble. if you have ever attempted to keep up with the joneses you can understand what i mean by jealousy incapacitating your happiness. this is an excellent way to find oneself deep in debt. the jealousy drives us to compete to be the better person than someone we are jealous of or over.

real love is not driven by competition. you and i must first accept ourselves, our situation and our life as it is with confidence. love must first be applied to “me” before i can effectively love outwardly. everyone has some strengths and some weaknesses. my weaknesses can cause me to compare myself and what i have or don’t have with someone else. this leads to discontentment and then jealousy. therefore, contentment is a key element when combating jealousy.

our society does not make contentment an easy pursuit. realizing that there will always be someone, somewhere with better looks, skills and talents than i have is the first thing i must come to grips with. there are many things that i would love to be able to do like a pro but can not. i may attempt to improve my skill but understand that if it does not come as naturally to me as my husband, friend or family member this does not represent me as a whole person. i would love to be able to paint beautiful paintings. however, my paintings usually look like my 5 year old grand daughter’s art work. i have decided that if i really want to paint…i should go for an abstract and paint purely for the relaxation and entertainment value for myself. on the other hand, my strengths lie in facilitating, organizing, decorating and many other talents that i truly enjoy and see benefits from.

as a child, i was the kid hanging from the monkey bars wishing that it would stretch my body so that i could be taller. sad fact…it never worked. i then spent many years wearing high heels in the most inappropriate times because heels did make me taller but were not functional in every situation. i actually went hiking once in heels…can anyone say ridiculous. i can. i did. i had to come to grips with my body height, shape and looks. accepting myself for who i am, how i was made and what i had to offer was key to obtaining the ability to relax and enjoy the journey that i was on.

jealousy also redirects our focus. there occurs an unhealthy attachment to what another person has, is or is doing. when we are focused so intently on someone else’s life we are not able to put the necessary energy into building our own hopes, dreams and goals.

envy takes jealousy to a deeper level. envy drives us to want what others have. an inordinate desire for what others have develops like covetousness. once this desire takes root, compromising our life value system becomes easy to do. this is how affairs occur. often a person will decide that having the object of the inordinate desire is vital and taking what is does not belong to them is rationalized.

here are a few things i have learned about de-cluttering jealousy from my heart:

treat the underlying fallacy concerning “me” and “you.” realize and view everyone as equal. everyone has the same wish to be happy and to succeed, and not to be unhappy or to fail. everyone has the same right to be happy and to succeed and the same right not to be unhappy or to fail.
the grass is not always greener over “there” – green grass requires work and mowing. too often, we see someone else’s life and assume it is easier than our own life. this is also a fallacy. no matter the journey, there will be difficult paths to walk. difficulties truly are the places where we grow and develop our skills and become more of who we should be. just because someone else seems to have a better path…be careful…you and i may not enjoy walking the journey they have made to get to where they are.
anything that i must cling to in order to retain it might not be meant for me. i see so many single women who attempt to cling to an abusive boyfriend because they do not want to loose the relationship and be alone. therefore, jealousy and envy drive them to unflattering behaviours. if i could open my heart and give one gift to the single women in the world, it would be the ability to see that they are worthy of respect. please do not allow someone to treat you like you are worthless. you are valuable and if a person can not see and value that in a dating relationship…let go…don’t tie yourself to someone who disrespects you. note: marriage does not fix this poor attitude in a mate!
in a committed relationship like marriage, when there is cause for jealousy presenting itself…look for a deeper problem and work to fix that. jealousy is usually a warning sign. don’t ignore it. first, be honest with yourself and make any necessary changes that you need to make. then, look for deeper issues in the relationship that need work. if you are not successful, seek help. i always say, we go to the doctor to repair our broken body, we should be willing to do the same when we need help with a broken heart, spirit or soul. the options range from prayer and wisdom, a trusted counsellor, or when necessary a professional.

peace of mind makes the body healthy, but jealousy is like a cancer. -proverbs

jealousy, whose acid raindrops blurred my vision and burned holes in my heart…-unknown

love is not jealous…it should not burn holes in your heart nor mine….it should not eat at us like cancer. love should contain a healthy respect for who you and i are as well as the one we love. cultivating seeds of love, like patience and kindness (as a start), will help us to recognize the weeds that appear, such as envy and jealousy. we can address them quickly before they take root and produce painful results in the heart.

thank you for joining me today. it’s wonderful to have you stop by. my heart is to share some helpful wisdom to make your journey a little easier. i hope you have enjoyed the blog.

if you found this blog helpful, please share it with your circle of influence-friends, family, work mates. open a dialogue focused on building stronger relationships with real love as the foundation. make the part of the world you live in a better place.

have a great weekend,

patience has a partner in love

Posted on September 5, 2013 by Dee Clark

all of creation responds to kindness in a similar way. kindness disarms defences and brings hearts to a common level.

i’m not all surprised that the the first description of what real love looks like is that love is patient followed by love is kind. have you ever attempted to show kindness in a state of impatience? can you say difficult? however, have you shown kindness and seen impatience melt like snow?

one of my pet peeves is rudeness. funny thing is that my distaste for rudeness can make me impatient and rude…dah, dee…how does that work? you dislike rude people so you’ll be rude. that is not a congruent philosophy, is it?

a key to converting impatience to patience is the space between our impulses and our actions. it’s all about the timing.

customer service people often face hour by hour rude customer’s which can wear them down and bring out the rudeness in their personalities. dealing with a rude store clerk provokes a reaction inside me. there was a time that it provoked anger, frustration and corresponding responses…but over time i’ve learned that if i allow a kind response to provoke my actions, the result is more beneficial.

i was standing in line the other day at a shop and the clerk was not very nice. i stood and listened as she snapped at customer after customer. some customers snapped back and others exhibited the sting on their stunned faces. when it was my turn to be served, i began with, ” bless your heart, it looks like you are rushed off your feet. does that make for a rough day?” her whole demeanor changed. “i’m having such a difficult day.” then she began to share her heart concerning many other difficulties she was facing in her life. i was presented with a wounded heart. opportunities like that are jewels to me and had i impulsively responded to her rudely…i would have denied myself that opportunity. by the time i stepped away from the counter, she and i were giggling, she gave me a special manager’s discount and she thanked me for putting her day back into a positive perspective. as i approached the exit i heard her say, ” hello, how is your day going? at least the sun is shining, that makes the day more fun when you are shopping.” the customer behind me was being greeted kindly and cheerfully.

patience and kindness are partners when it comes to love. they are a great team!

on this subject, i think Paul had some great advice (message version):
if you help, just help, don’t take over;
if you teach, stick to your teaching;
if you give encouraging guidance, be careful that you don’t get bossy;
if you’re put in charge, don’t manipulate;
if you’re called to give aid to people in distress, keep your eyes open and be quick to respond;
if you work with the disadvantaged, don’t let yourself get irritated with them or depressed by them.

Keep a smile on your face.

Love from the center of who you are; don’t fake it.
Run for dear life from evil; hold on for dear life to good.
Be good friends who love deeply; practice playing second fiddle.

Don’t burn out; keep yourselves fueled and aflame.
Be alert servants of the Master, cheerfully expectant.
Don’t quit in hard times; pray all the harder.

Help the needy; be inventive in hospitality.
Bless your enemies; no cursing under your breath.
Laugh with your happy friends when they’re happy; share tears when they’re down.

Get along with each other; don’t be stuck-up.
Make friends with nobodies; don’t be the great somebody.

Don’t hit back;
discover beauty in everyone.

If you’ve got it in you, get along with everybody.

Don’t insist on getting even; that’s not for you to do. “I’ll do the judging,” says God. “I’ll take care of it.”

Our Scriptures tell us that if you see your enemy hungry, go buy that person lunch, or if he’s thirsty, get him a drink. Your generosity will surprise him with goodness.

Don’t let evil get the best of you; get the best of evil by doing good.

a kind heart is not for the wimpy…it shows strength of character and maturity.

Paul also advised, “Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking…always dragging you down to its level of immaturity.” it is much easier to fit into a grumpy culture; however, it’s not nearly as rewarding. being grumpy doesn’t get you closer to your goals and dreams of being loved…but kindness will.

even the most difficult person to deal with is on a search for acceptance and love. the love we long for is true and genuine…and it is patient and kind.

my advice for practicing kindness: the most fun you’ll have is to get out there and share a few random acts of kindness…it will melt your heart and the hearts of those you show kindness to…have fun with it!

remember practice makes perfect, this one should be easy!

if you accept the challenge, let me know how it goes in the comments section…or share how you have turned potentially volatile situations around by showing love in the form of kindness.

thanks for reading,
D

how to practice love in the form of patience

Posted on September 4, 2013 by Dee Clark

impatience is an emotion. patience is a skill. like all skills, patience is a life skill that can be practiced until application can be made more easily than when you begin.

the relationships that we invest in are truly rewarding. our hearts hope that they will make us happy beyond belief. talk to a young couple before their wedding day or before the birth of a new baby. the heart is full of expectations for the future. it is when reality meets those expectations causing disappointment that frustration surfaces.

when my daughter was five years old, my husband and i decided that we wanted another baby. it would be three more years before the birth of my son. there was the first expectation that met frustration. we had a timing in our mind and yet there was a long period of time to wait until we received confirmation that we would have our second child join the family. if you have ever planned to start or continue your family only to have reality present an alternative timing, it is heart wrenching, frustrating and painful. once he was born, we were elated. then came the sleepless nights. he did not sleep as well as my daughter had. it was a shock to the system after eight years of normal sleep routines. i would have difficult days of weariness that were trying. we made it through the sleepless nights, finally. then as a toddler, he began too bite other children. do you know how embarrassing and stressful it is when your child harms a friend’s child? this was not going as it had the first time around or the way i had expected. this lovely, beautiful little boy was the delight of my heart but he was trying my patience…in many more ways than i ever desired to endure.

what was i to do? i was not enjoying those moments i was living. i wanted to fast forward to easier, more enjoyable days, the future seemed so distant and far away…when life as i had hoped it would be would appear.

i was given advice to “be patient”, encouragement that he would get through the stage(s) and things would settle down. we often think another person should find patience easier to conjure up than we do in our own difficult situations. we mean well… we do…but we find taking our own advice impossible when faced with our own circumstances that evoke frustration, anger or pain; a stubborn or distant spouse, a self-destructing teenager, a special needs parent, a bullying boss, or a rude stranger.

i was irrevocably and inescapably stuck in the moment—my feet were tied to it. had i writhed and hollered as much as i wanted, i was still not going anywhere. i was there. immobile.

the available antidote was patience. it speaks of self-control, restraint, delayed gratification, bearing or enduring pain, difficulty, provocation, or annoyance; tolerance and persevering. it was not my idea of a party that i wanted to attend. yet, it was necessary.

the revelation for me was that patience is a skill, not an inherited trait i happened not to inherit. it leads to relaxation, not self-harnessing. it gives you the freedom to have a pleasant time even when the baby gods are playing with you. it converts the helpless rage of impatience into a delicious sense of spaciousness.

patience creates more space between impulse and action.

impulsiveness causes you to act hastily. patience creates feelings of peace and calm, as opposed to the anger and frustration that often arises with impatience. impatience is on the anger continuum. first, you have irritation, then impatience and then anger and, at the far end, rage. patience keeps your anger turned off.

so, how do we practice this skill and develop patience? how can we apply patience, so that frustration goes away, outrage cools, and peace is yours?

1. accept that whatever is happening right now is the way it is. accept that you are here, living this moment as it is. coming to terms with reality helps you to focus your emotions.

2. apply persistence. that’s the capacity to keep on going even though you can’t yet see the end result. it’s what keeps us moving toward our goal and thus helps us make our dreams come true.

3. practice cultivating a sense of peacefulness, serenity or calmness in the face of what is. address poor, learned behaviour such as ranting, fretting or working yourself into a frenzy. stop, breath deeply, count to 10 (or 100), or separate yourself from the situation until your emotions return to a calmer state. whisper a prayer or recite calming scriptures. many find repeating the serenity prayer helpful.

4. focus on your goal of healthy relationships and perfected love.

5. focus your effort, energy and skills on problem solving. pursue wisdom in order to find a solution, this will produce a more effective result.

6. trust yourself, apply compassion when you fail at applying patience…practice makes perfect…keep going…all skill development requires time and practice, practice, practice.

today as i planned to write a post on practicing patience, wouldn’t you know, things did not go to plan. i woke not feeling well. i faced a busy work day. and my husband seemed to want me to help him do something every 5 minutes, and in the midst of all that i lost half of the post before i was able to publish it. opportunities to practice will present themselves. it never fails. i had to laugh at myself and my situation…

i told myself, “dee, love is patient…” and i made the 100th cup of coffee of the day as requested and began to reconstruct my post.

patience is the first and possibly one of the most difficult steps to producing genuine love in the heart. it is a skill. if you find impatience surfacing in your heart, do not fear…you can apply wisdom, practice this skill and develop real love…love that will not fail at building strong, fulfilling relationships.

the next we will explore the fact that love is kind.

i hope you will join me,
D

love and impatience don’t belong together

Posted on September 3, 2013 by Dee Clark

relationships engulf the biggest part of our lives. can you think of how many of your activities involve a relationship in one way or the other? the most important to many of us is family. add church, friends, work, school, community and strangers (store clerks, bus drivers, joggers, and more) and it doesn’t take long to fill a day. Relationships enrich our lives but they can also try our patience.

interestingly enough, when i was searching for the best description i could find for love, i found nothing better than 1 Corinthians 13.

wouldn’t you know, the very first description was that love is patient.

it would be very easy to read over that word and think, ” oh, isn’t that nice.” we are not going to speed past this word today…we are going to stop and consider it…think it over and decide what we can do with this. after all, it is wisdom. by now, you know how much i adore wisdom.

imagine a thermometer. a temperature gauge. how would you measure your patience level? if you are like me, you might imagine that you are pretty tolerant except in a few instances.

what would be your patience level in these situations:

1. you are sitting in a traffic jam, it’s hot, other driver’s are honking and trying to cut in front of each other.

2. you are waiting in line at the bank on a busy Friday afternoon and there is only one teller waiting on customers.

3. you have had a busy day. You just want to eat dinner when you get home but your spouse thought you were bringing it home with you.

4. you are late for work, the keys are lost. the kids have a hundred questions about when you are leaving? your spouse drove the car last and can’t remember where the keys are.

5. you have a stubborn elderly parent who relies on your care.

6. your boss seems to always be in a bad mood and you catch the wrong end of the stick continually.

actually, it’s not difficult to conjure up a list of frustrating examples, life is full of them. our patience gets tried right and left.

love is patient.
love never gives up.
love endures long.

what exactly does it mean to be patient?

a good ole google search renders this definition:
.
1. bearing or enduring pain, difficulty, provocation, or annoyance with calmness.
2. marked by or exhibiting calm endurance of pain, difficulty, provocation, or annoyance.
3. tolerant; understanding: an unfailingly patient leader and guide.
4. Persevering; constant: With patient industry, she revived the failing business and made it thrive.
5. capable of calmly awaiting an outcome or result; not hasty or impulsive.
6. capable of bearing or enduring pain, difficulty, provocation, or annoyance: “My uncle Toby was a man patient of injuries” (Laurence Sterne).

1. enduring trying circumstances with even temper
2. tolerant; understanding
3. capable of accepting delay with equanimity
4. persevering or diligent: a patient worker

we live in a world where patience is no longer a virtue. with technology, we no longer have to wait for “snail mail” (even the slang name indicates…it’s too slow to use). my husband gets a bit agitated if he drives through McD’s and they are slow getting his order to the window. he likes to watch the timer above the window and 2 minutes is too slow. really? i’ve been warning him about the 2-3 hour wait for a table at my favourite American restaurant on our next visit home. i’m going to enjoy watching him practice his patience. ☺

an impatient person never wants to wait for others, or does so with great reluctance. an impatient person feels angsty when things do not go to plan. an impatient person usually feels a great sense of urgency to get things over with and to move on to the next thing, the next task, the next place, the next stop. he/she usually has little regard or interest to what’s going on at this moment in time, because in his/her mind, he/she is already thinking about what he/she has to do next.

our patience is challenged when we are faced with circumstances out of our control, when there is a lack of planning, when our expectations are not met, when we don’t have a clear understanding of the situation and when there is difficulty with communication.

i don’t know about you but there are plenty of opportunities that come my way in all five of these areas.

personally, i was most impatient when i lost my keys in mornings. i was always trying to get one more load of laundry done, or dinner in the crock pot before work. i was not consistently organized so my keys could be any where…which meant, when i was in a hurry…there would be a lot of yelling at the kids and my husband. not a good look. it’s not helpful for building good relationships either.
the underlying problem for me was my perfectionist tendency. this tendency was a driving force in my life that often threw me into chaos and my impatience would end up sky rocketing.

my husband is a what I call a “yapper”, a “chatty cathy” type personality. he loves to talk like no one i have ever known. when we were first married he would wake me at 3am because he was awake and “needed” to talk. he becomes very impatient if i take too long to make my point when we are communicating. he already has his next thought formed and can’t wait until it’s his turn to talk again. Lol. my temptation to be impatient having to listening non stop all day is often pressing but i’m getting better at being patient everyday.

wanting what we want when we want it. this desire repeatedly manifests itself as a constant feeling of impatience, a source of self-pressure (in an unhealthy way), and an annoyance at things that stand in your way. these are negative, tension-filled, and fear-based emotions which have no place in our lives. impatience is an emotion that has no place in our heart. it is destructive.

as a result, many of our relationships become strained and begin to break down. this result is seldom a favoured goal.

colossians and hebrews tells us that we can exercise and practice patience. when i was growing up, the members of my dad’s congregations would declare, “don’t pray for patience because tribulation works patience.” we’ll, who wants to invite,much less pray, for tribulation to come into their lives. there seems to be enough of that without asking for more. so, the common result would be that impatience would continue to rule. problem NOT solved.

i think we should look at the idea of practicing patience and explore how to develop this skill. i invite you to join me tomorrow for a little practical exploration. let’s look at replacing impatience…the emotion that has not place in our heart…with patience. this wisdom might just help develop stronger bonds of love and improve our relationships.

please join me again on this journey as we look at what love is and how to develop genuine, life changing, never failing love in our lives and relationships.

as always, get your friends and family in on the adventure and share this post with them. together we can make A Difference in our circles of influence.

see you next time,
D