Have you ever had to make a leap of faith? A few years back, my husband and I attended a director’s meeting that turned our world upside down. We walked away with that sinking feeling that life was about … Continue reading
Contributing photographer, Andrea Lekare, captured a wonderful ephemeral moment. Andrea is my cousin’s daughter from Mexico. Thanks, Andrea.
At the end of the 90’s, I was struggling. My marriage was failing, I felt lost and I was tremendously lonely in my circumstances. Oddly enough, my ex-husband whispered, to an acquaintance, that he felt I needed a friend. And I did. This young woman walked through my office door, sat down -friendly and welcoming. She was full of compassion, and genuine warmth. That day, she extended an invitation and I accepted. We became friends.
I didn’t know much about friendship. Most of my life I had never lived in one place long enough to develop anything long or lasting. I envied other kids who had known each other since the first year they began attending school. I had much to learn.
I had no freedom of expression. I rarely shared deep emotions. I maintained a consistent protective distance. All the while longing for the very thing I was pushing away. I possessed no self-esteem or confidence or sense of identity even though I worked diligently to produce a well put together exterior to hide that fact.
Once my marriage began failing, often people would tell me that they thought I had it all together and lived a perfect life. That’s the problem with the perfectionist tendencies that consumed my life…they caused me to create a false reality -a facade – to hide away the mess that was on the inside. I was great at hiding. I desperately wanted to be invisible as if that would prevent the pain or ease it in some way. But it didn’t. It never did. In fact, I had an appetite for good things in life: laughter, joy, sunshine, celebration, and happiness.
Instead I was like a wounded puppy afraid of everything I desired.
My new friend was thoughtful and sincere. she possessed a curiosity that seemed to drive her to explore new things. I found warmth of heart. I think at the beginning of our relationship she was more like a mentor. Although I didn’t want to be a project or someone for her to help, I was. She began to teach me how to live a full life out of Wisdom. We spent hours praying and searching for practical ways to live a healthy, vibrant life from the best source of Wisdom I had ever found.
She encouraged me to change the way I thought about life and living in a non-constricting way that was freeing to my spirit, body and mind; relieving repressions.
Wisdom stimulated my creativity, ambition, and drive. Enthusiasm for life began to fill my heart. I found a willingness to embrace new ideas with enjoyment and a sense of exploration and creative play.
The more that wholeness and well-being began to take place, the more our relationship changed and deepened from mentorship to friendship. We became peers. We challenged each other to be better versions of ourselves. We disagreed at times. We applied forgiveness when necessary. We supported and encouraged each other. And then I moved to New Zealand, some 10,000 kms away. It was a huge adjustment for both of us.
I miss her in my day to day living. Now, we meet across the miles via technology, sip coffee together, and share our hearts in a different way than when we began.
This little figurine sits on my dresser reminding me: I don’t feel like a lost puppy anymore and I am blessed with the miracle of friendship.
You are beautiful, my darling, beautiful beyond words. Your eyes are like doves behind your veil. Your hair falls in waves, like a flock of goats winding down the slopes. ~Solomon
When was the last time you took a leap of faith?
As we have opportunity, let us do good to everyone. ~Paul
Whatever the activity in which you engage, do it with all your ability, ~Solomon
Like cold water to a thirsty soul,so is good news from a far country. ~Proverbs
There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens:~Solomon
Anxiety in a man’s heart weighs it down, But a good word makes it glad. – Proverbs
Sometimes losing your way is the only way to find your way. ~Unknown
Orange is a favorite color of mine. Fiery, bright, warm, brilliant and bold. So, I can’t think of a better representation than my sweet Ella Bell. Meet my granddaughter who wears her glistening orange crown with special flare. She is confident, strong, bold, flamboyant, creative and determined, as every woman should be.
Do you have a friend who just doesn’t seem to be themselves? Something about them has changed and you’re wondering what’s going on for them?
It can be difficult to know exactly how to help a friend who is going through a difficult time, but your support will mean the world to her.
Listen with all your heart.
Being present, even if there is silence, means more than she can put into words.
And coffee…well, coffee is it’s own kind of comfort. Definitely share a cup of coffee with her.
Friends help us carry our load when all feels lost in our world. Supporting a friend when times are tough with the little things that we do really makes a difference.
Originally posted on TIME:
This post is in partnership with Inc., which offers useful advice, resources and insights to entrepreneurs and business owners. The article below was originally published at Inc.com. While I have no soccer skills, I once played…
When the wheel was invented, it started a revolution. I might be treading a fine line here, but I expect this little challenge to be wheely fun. I never get tyred of puns. Hopefully mine won’t leave you flat. 😜 … Continue reading
You can sit looking longingly at your future.
Unless you take responsibility,
Unless you make a move forward,
Unless you take action,
You can’t own it.
It’s your destiny.
The reward of a thing well done is having done it. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson Mr. Emerson is completely correct but this girl likes a little bit of a reward now and then. Every summer when it’s time to take a … Continue reading