How to Show Mature Love

20130923-213002.jpghow mature are you when it comes to love?

the last characteristic in my little series of posts on love is…

love never a fails…never stops, never fades, doesn’t become obsolete…it does not end.

in the midst of an argument? you are thinking, “I don’t know what to do.” love…never fails! ego will build defences, anger will inflame the situation, sarcasm will invite a bloody nose 😉, standing your rightful ground will end communication…love never fails.

actually, when i look closely at this wisdom found in the letter to the Corinthians, it is pretty clear to me that love would probably put a lot of relationship issues to rest.

let’s do a quick test. read the list below. choose which of the two words evoke a positive response in you:

1. Patience vs impatience
2. Kindness vs unkindness
3. Trust vs jealousy
4. Humble vs prideful
5. Mannerly vs rude
6. Selfless vs selfish
7. Irritable vs easy going
8. Forgiving vs holds a grudge
9. Supportive vs throwing you under the bus
10. Justice vs injustice
11. Believes the best in you vs accusatory
12. Never gives up vs quits easily

how many of the second of the two words do you wish more people would use more when dealing with you?

none? me, too!

in fact, i have spent a lot of time in my life asking people NOT to deal with me according to the second words of the list. i feel quite passionate about not being dealt with in those ways.

ah-ha moment…then i shouldn’t deal with people that way, right? because i know how it feels…and i DON’T like it. then why act that way myself. should be common sense, eh?

nothing we do, think, or believe is of any importance if used as an excuse for not loving or behaving in a loving way. not what you believe. not what you hope for…although both are awesome…they should not be used in place of love.

that doesn’t include accountability. love IS NoT blind!!!! love acts justly…so if accountability is necessary…love holds us accountable.

i have been posting about what love looks like, how love behaves and the wisest ways to apply love. love requires maturity. at the end of the letter in Corinthians, Paul makes the statement that when he was a child he acted liked a child and when he was old he put away childish things…Paul has not stopped giving wisdom about love.

the second word in my little test are childish behaviors.

watch any 2 year old…you will see them.

have you ever said to someone acting out those second words, “don’t be so juvenile!”? or “grow up,”?

we recognize them as juvenile, behaviors in others… we should be objective enough to call it as we see it in ourselves…if we do…we are applying maturity.

i truly believe that our day to day relationships and our own peace of mind would be so much more successful if we would stop being childish; throwing tantrums, calling names, quitting when we don’t get our own way, being vengeful, irritable or irritating…

and love with a real, mature level of love.

mature, real love is….

Patient
Kind
Trusting
Selfless
Humble
Easy going
Mannerly
Forgiving
Supportive
Just
Believes the best
Keeps going!!!

mature, real love never fails…

the move is going well…although a big job, i love that i get a chance to do a major “spring clean”…I’ll be sorted for summer fun this way, eh?

thank you for your patience while i have not had internet and was not able to post…feels good to get back into the swing of things.

D

7 thoughts on “How to Show Mature Love

  1. Thank you Dee.

    Aren’t blogs amazing? So glad to have caused a positive impact on someone’s day! Of course you may use my comments unconditionally—I wrote them for you, they are yours!

    I’d certainly consider it an honour to be mentioned or to have you post a link to my poetry. A wonderful surprise, thank you!

    Will.

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  2. Hi Dee. Congratulations on this original and inspiring blog. I admire the objectivity of this series of posts. Dealing with intrinsically abstract concepts is very hard to do objectively and in a way that everyone can relate to on some level. I think you’ve done a splendid job! The pivotal issue, in my opinion, is your point No. 6: Selfishness, or as I see it, egocentricity. It is pivotal because it is at the very core of our instinctive nature—so much so that most of the other points could be said to derive from this one. If we are honest about it, and were to eliminate the “I”, the “me” and the “my” out of our contextual frame of reference for love, it becomes distorted, when it should become more symmetrical. Elevating one’s ego above oneself, and to the exclusion of itself, is an awesome goal for any thinking person. Then again, I look into the eyes of child in need and it seem almost right there for the taking.

    BTW, thanks for liking my poetry!

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    • Thank you so much for your kind comment. You have actually inspired me today…I have a post I would like to write (all going well with my schedule today) based on some of your coments (positively of course). I want to get your permission first, though, to include your comment in the blog and I will link back to your site if you are ok with that.

      Have a good day!
      D

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  3. Mature love really takes time to develop because it goes against all of our own fleshly and selfish desires. Thank God that He showed us a perfect example of what true love is so that we can learn from His ways!

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    • Anna,
      I totally agree. That is why handling love as an emotion instead of as a spiritual law is so dibilitating. I’m hoping to sumarize my blogs today with this point…still organizing after my big move so all going well…I’ll share more on that later today.

      The key is that we do have the best example of how to use wisdom in developing this life skill (not emotion) in our lives and for that I am most greatful and blessed.

      Thank you for your contribution to the topic…

      BTW, your blog is very imspiring to me. I LOVE your style!
      D

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      • I just moved a few weeks ago too so I know how fun all of the packing/un-packing is :) Hope you’re all settled into your new place!

        I’m looking forward to reading the summary of your blogs! Love is one of those subjects you can probably write about endlessly… especially since God’s view of love is so different than that of this worlds!

        Be blessed Dee!

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